I have been debating whether or not to post about personal issues, but I just need to vent a few things, get them out there, take a deep breath and move on... sorry.
The past few weeks have been terrific and terrifying. We had an amazing trip to California last week which I will make a separate post about - it was so necessary & I absolutely LOVE my in-laws! I feel amazingly blessed to be able to say that. We ended up extending our stay by a day and for some strange reason I feel like I have had a really hard time catching up since then.
I need to back up a minute... the day we left Jarrett had a dr appt with an endocrinologist. We have had concerns with his size for quite some time. Anyway, I really didn't know what to expect, but I thought we would just start some kind of testing to find out why he is so small. I was NOT prepared to hear that he is most likely Growth Hormone Deficient (GHD) and would need to start treatment in 2 weeks. His 'treatment' is going to be a shot of growth hormones that I will have to give him EVERY DAY of his life until he has no more growth potential around age 16!!! Pretty much everything the dr told me after that is pretty fuzzy. He will have some blood work done and probably some x-rays, maybe mri, but dr feels that he needs to get started on the drugs right away. I am still trying to learn as much as I can about this whole thing. Am I making the right decision? I know that his body needs this, but at what cost? (besides the $20K a year it will cost if insurance decides not to cover this) Is there a possibility that he can catch up on his own? What if I wait a few years and try some alternatives - acupressure, changes in diet/vitamins? Will it be too late to make a difference? I don't think the dr would be so insistent if he didn't have a good case, and I feel in my heart I need to trust him... It is just so hard to swallow right now. P.S. His meds will show up tomorrow then a nurse will come by and teach me how to use the device that will administer his meds - this is really happening and I am freaking out!!
So, while all this is going on, we FINALLY have been pre-approved to buy a HOUSE!!! This has been a LONG time coming and we are soooooo ready for this. However, we are now faced with the daunting task of finding a house. What side of town? Do we get a smaller house in a comfortable are of town or a BIG house way far away from our friends and family? What if we move in and everything falls apart? What if the school is all wrong or the ward? I have wanted this for so long, and now that it's here I am scared to death (and still very excited at the same time)!! It is such a strange feeling.
Another GREAT thing has happened too!! I am going to be an official Grocery Smarts instructor in a few weeks!! Finding this company has been such a HUGE blessing in our lives that I feel completely overcome with gratitude to our Heavenly Father for answering our prayers. We needed to find an extra $400-500 in our budget to be able to get a house. We live pretty simply already, so the only area we have any wiggle room is our grocery/household items. Well, how do you not buy diapers, milk or chicken to save a few bucks? With a family of 6 that seemed impossible. So, I went to this little coupon class & as soon as she showed us how she bought a tube of toothpaste for .25 I was hooked! This was my first full month shopping with this method and I have saved over $500 on items I would have bought anyway for my family!! There is our mortgage payment. Oh, and now I get to teach classes and can start bringing in extra money by working a few days a week! GOD IS SOOOooo GOOD!!
So, here I sit with a house piled up with toys, laundry, dishes, and bills not sure where to start... On my mind: a new house, a new job, poking my baby everyday, and how on earth do I teach my almost 10 month old that it is OK for mommy to put her down and my boobs are not portable - no matter how hard you pull 'em!
Sorry for the rant - taking my deep breath - moving on....
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10 comments:
First of all...."poking my baby everyday"???? You're not pregnant, are you?
Sorry to hear about Jarrett's diagnosis. Is there any way you can get a second opinion before you start giving him the meds. Even just to help put your mind at rest that it really is what he needs? My cousin was diagnosed with GHD (he was older, but I can't remember how old). I remember that he was supposed to get shots, but I'm pretty sure they didn't end up giving them to him. He might be a little on the smaller side as an adult, but nothing extreme. I'll ask my mom if she remembers what they ended up doing.
Our new e-mail addy is timnragan@gmail.com. I'm really interested in this Grocery Smarts thing...the problem is that we live in the middle of NOWHERE and there are no chain grocery stores out here. So I might have to go into Salt Lake to actually shop, which doesn't happen all that often. Congratulations on becoming a teacher!
Oh, and I have a house if you want it ;). You'd have to have a zone variance though.
Ragan - "poking my baby" referring to giving Jarrett shots - I think a pregnancy right now would push me over the edge :-P
Yeah, after I commented I got to thinking that was probably what you meant. Oops!
Wow Jen we really need to talk more. I am so sorry to hear about Jarrett. But like you said God is SOOOOOOO GooD! If I can give you some advice..... I would get a second opinion even if you have started treatment just to put your mind at ease one way or another.
Jen you are a strong person and a wonderful mother. Heavenly Father knows that. And that is why He sent Jarrett to you.
When Eli was a baby we had to give him a shot every month, not every day but none the less it was hard.
Sometimes I used to wonder why me and what am I supposed to learn from all of this.
One day the spirit whispered to me, it's not always about you Mandy, this is just as much Eli's trial as it is yours. He was sent to you so you could help him through this season of his life.
Jen you will find a way to help all of you through this. You will also become an advocate for Jarrett and others dealing with the same struggles.
Just know that I love ya bunches and I am here for ya whatever you need. Mandy
Jen,
So sorry to hear about Jarrett, things will fall into place and I think it will become a blessing and you will see the good from it. Just remember your experiences will someday help someone else.
The house thing...yeah, that will all fall into place as well.. The Lord is not going to leave ya'll hanging and wandering alone. When the right house comes along you will know it and it will all come together. I have faith in that, it happened with us. Just trust in what the Spirit says and know you won't be led wrong, pray about it and it will work out. I know sounds cliche and probably dumb coming from me, but it's just the truth. Good Luck with it all and let me know if I can help..Wendi
Hi Jen,
Well, I don't know how old Jarrett is or how big he is, so I have no way to know where he falls in the average child. Stature sometimes does not happen until late into puberty. My own son, Adam, was quite the "runt" all of his young years up into High school. Once he hit 15-16 he zoomed up to the 6ft tall person he is now.
However, if you decide to do the Growth Hormone injections, just know that it could be worse for him, as a adolescent diabetic and shots daily for the rest of his life with the potential for damage to his other organs. So if you look at it that way, he is actually in a good place....albeit, I know it breaks your heart to have him go through this trial. He came through his birth problems in good shape so remain positive and keep your spirits high so that he sees it not as a punishment but as a part of life.
Words can't help I know, but just continue in your faith and all will be well. You have a wonderful supportive husband and extended family members, draw on them for strength.
Love you, Aunt Jacquelyn
I read this post the other day but didn't have time to comment. I have been thinking about you and your family since. You are one of the best mom's I know. You are amazing in so many ways. Jarrett is lucky you are his mom because you take such good care of him and your other kiddos!
Also, congrats on the grocery smarts and the new house!
Jen, I've thought this a million times but never said it to you--- you are an amazing person!!! I just want you to know that. Trust your mommy-gut instincts with Jarrett... they'll never lead you the wrong way! :) Also, I need your expert help on this Grocery Smarts stuff. I was so overwhelmed at the class the other week. You'll be such a great teacher! You are so enthusiastic about it. :)
Did you get the job that was posted on their website? I want the dirt on that.
I saw you a couple times at the Valentines dance and I kept trying to come say Hi. I would see you while I was talking to someone, then when I was done I'd turn around and you'd be GONE!!! :) You looked like you were having FUN dancing :) You look great by the way!
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